Redefine...

It has been nearly 3months since I arrive in China. Honestly speaking, life during these few months were nothing to me. It has no much meaning to me compared to my busy life in M'sia, mainly because I used to think that only busyness defines how meaningful one life is. What I refer busyness is having many things to deal, like joining a big group of friends to work together, having club meetings, etc.. I was busy till the extend that I was afraid that I'd miss out anything everyday. So, my calendar was full with tasks to do, my file was full with sticky notes, and even my handphone showed reminders. Everyday looking at those tasks awaiting me, I felt my life was meaningful. Till now, I still miss those moments.

When I first arrived, I used to tell myself and my friends how nice is here, how aggressive people are here, and it'll be a really great eye-opener for me. I'd tell them I got selected by the Student Career Development Association and I need to deal with companies, etc.. This sounds like I'll really be active and sociable, and BUSY. But, now, I want to say:" It's not really like that actually, here is still Asia." Nothing much different. I'm the one who planned outings. I'm the one asking to play sports. -.-"

Here, life in China was not as busy as that, sometimes even making me to feel depressed because I have only 6hrs' class per week while others have full schedule. I join clubs but the clubs are not as active as STACT Club. I planned for trips but every weekend, there must have something stopping me, like club tasks which required you to face your laptop for hours, house moving, assignments, midterm, etc.. Nah..These are all excuses, you surely think and I do not deny. I really hated myself for having so much time but doing nothing much (means NOT BUSY= NO MEANING)!

Nooo....This period in China has actually slowed down my pace and allowed me to think. I suddenly understand what Chen always says "Understand yourself". Now, it doesn't matter anymore whether I can mix around with the people there, as long as I've tried. Tian Xin is trying to figure out more things, exploring more things...

Since now, every day in China will be meaningful to me as long as I know what I am doing and why I am doing..Let's redefine my life again..

Have a nice day and more posts to share in coming days..

End of my STACT Club life...

My journey in STACT Club has finally come to an end after my last project- the 21st Community Service Project. It was really a tough one with so many challenges given the clashing class schedule, members quitting, conflicts occurring among members, local people not supporting, etc.. Everyone was so stressed and got pissed off easily with any changes. For my last project in STACT, I tried everything at one time that you couldn't imagine, e.g., taking up the role of DISCIPLINE MASTER, giving speech on a closing ceremony, scolding people, and even being hated. Nah..all these are actually unimportant.

The most meaningful part for me is the changes by every single member throughout the period, from joining as new members, attending trainings, and till enjoying themselves very much during the campfire. As I said, it was tough so at first I greatly disagreed on having this project. Yet, at the moment I said "OK!", I told myself no matter what happened, I'd be there as a supporting role. Because of this concept, I was allowing things to go easily and I became afraid when things were going too easily that members might not learn anything and really enjoy the true CS. The spirit was not there as well, especially when members were quiting one by one. I did not know how to support anymore yet I was pretending to support by comforting them and making promises which I didn't know how many promises had I kept. sorry, guys..

As time passed, the only fear I felt was not members quitting but members giving up since I strongly believed that "no problems can't be solved". One week before the CS, from 30members, it dropped till 22 members. One by one, I called and talked. for those who couldn't make it, I just felt sorry to them. But some who couldn't pass their own obstacles, I felt sad because it was just one more step to announce success. However, while convincing these people, they reminded me," Is it only considered success for us to go through that 7days?" To Tian Xin, it was a "Yes!". But after this, I will answer, "It depends."

I really got inspired by seniors and juniors.

At the end of the 21st CS, I was glad that many improved in attitude aspects or skills, like Adrian who didn't like dancing last time, Sou Eei who talked very softly last time, Penny who had no patience, etc.. And during this CS, Adrian encouraged the students of his group to dance , Sou Eei became the MC of our last event, and Penny who became patient even though she needed to take 2 MC roles.

I'm really glad to announce a SUCCESS of this 21st COMMUNITY SERVICE PROJECT. As Tian Xin always says, "CS is really magical as it brings us laughters and cries when being touched by everyone's growth,change and improvement."

22ppl was nvr a worry for me to make this 21st CS a success because I know we'd have 100% support frm everyone!

p/s: Before ending,there's a sentence I would never forget. A sentence which was spoken by the Maintenance Group Leader to comfort everyone one night before departing to PEKAN NANAS:

" No worry! I promise everything will be packed nicely by 6pm!" A simple sentence, a simple promise but did a great impact to the whole team!

THE END

Every end is followed with a NEW beginning...My clubbing life stops here and more for me to explore.

1st Stop: Suzhou, China for 1 semester